Finding Home
by plappermouth
Summary: When I escaped a world of pain and cruelty in search of my family I never expected to end up in the middle of a raging war, but here I am...Smack in the middle of a war that I should walk away from if only I could...But love is a funny thing, and it rarely lets us choose our own paths in life.
1. Prologue

They took me on the day I was born, before anyone even had the chance to know me, to learn to love me. The nurse, one of _them,_ whisked me away and took their fragile memories of me along. By the time my twin was born I was long gone from their world, their memories, never to be missed at all. It would take years for me to discover the truth of my origin, of my humanity, and by then I wasn't even sure if I had any humanity left to find.

In my earliest memory I am two, maybe three years old, and I am staring up at a solid wooden door, wondering if anything lies beyond it if there's a world outside this room. I wouldn't find out for another four years. Those first seven years of my life... Well, I don't like to think about them, and if I'm honest I successfully don't, most of the time. But sometimes, mostly in my dreams, they sneak up on me and I find myself awakening with tears streaming down my face. I don't know why, because the seven years that followed were much, much worse, but when I dream of those I don't cry.

I was fourteen when I found out that I was human, whatever that was supposed to mean. _They_ never talked about _what_ I was, just that I was something lesser, disgusting, unworthy of anything but _their_ perverse curiosities. Of course, I always knew that I wasn't like _them_ , I obviously lacked their grace, their power, their magnificence, but I had never really thought to wonder what exactly that made me. I existed to serve them, their curiosities, their whims, and wishes. I was no entity of my own, didn't even have a name to call my own until I turned fourteen and met another one like me. It was he who told me that I was human, a girl at that and that I ought to have a name as all humans do. He said I reminded him of his sister and so he decided to call me Aya. It was the first name I ever owned. His name was Darryn, and he was a year younger than me. They hadn't taken him at birth, as they had me. He had been in the wrong place at the wrong time and before he had known him his own world was gone. And so was his freedom. I was selfishly happy about that, because while he had lost everything, I had, for the first time in my life, gained something: a friend.

I didn't get to keep him for long.

One day they took him for one of their experiments and he never came back. It was the first time in my entire life that I felt loss, and that was the beginning, really of my story. I had lost my family the day I was born, but I had never known them, never understood the concept of family, and therefore never known enough to realize that loss. But I had known Daryll, had laughed with him, cried with him, learned to be human with him, and when he left me, when _they_ took him from me, something stirred within me. Back then I didn't know what it was, but when it broke out two years later, loud and raging I had learned to call it by its name: Hatred.


	2. Chapter 1 - Castles in the Sky

The first thing I realized, when consciousness found me, was that it was raining. Cold heavy drops, running down my face, my arms and legs, covering me and washing away the blood on gore. I was cold, freezing really, but all I really managed to feel was relief. I had made it. I was out of their world, beyond their reach.I was free. The word rang through my mind like the sound of a distant bell, and all at once I was sobbing, loud heavy sobs, as the meaning of that word caught up with me. Free!

I knew that I needed to move, get out of the rain, find help for my injuries, but I couldn't move, couldn't even consider moving. Now that I had escaped, what was left? Where would I go now? I had no one….I was no one in this world. Finally, the sobs subsided and I opened my eyes, looking up into the dark, cloudy sky. The sky was different here, more…open? I couldn't quite name it.

The sound of voices in the distance pulled me out of my thoughts, as a flash of fear raced through me. Had I been wrong? Had they followed me after all? Had I never left at all? But no…the sky was different, somehow, and that had to mean something. For the first time since I'd awoken, I tried to move, only to realize that it was futile. My body was too weak, too broken from my escape and so I listened with dread to the approaching voices, hoping that I hadn't exchanged one hell for another.

„It came from over here, Severus", a man spoke, his voice gentle yet firm.

I tried to move again, desperate to not simply lay there helplessly, but by body still wouldn't obey me and now I could feel my mind slipping as well, desperately clinging to consciousness, fighting a losing battle.

„Over there" another man answered. His voice was detached, cold and oddly detached, as it didn't really belong to a person at all. It made me shiver, reminding me of the way they spoke. My eyes were so heavy, impossible to keep open.

„Careful, Albus" the cold voice spoke again „It could be a trap."

«That is entirely possible, Severus, but alas I will not risk an innocent life out of fear or mistrust. Call Poppy at once. »

Everything went black.

"I have never seen anything like it, Albus... It's simply awful."

A high pitched female voice cut its way through the fog surrounding my brain.

"And you are sure of this, Poppy?"

"Absolutely! Some of the scars are as old as she is, and it doesn't seem like the abuse ever stopped or decreased. The opposite in fact...Frankly I don't understand how the child is breathing at all... The things that have been done..."

"Now, now Poppy. Calm down. She is in a safe place now."

I opened my eyes and stared up at a white ceiling. I was laying in a bed, more comfortable than anything I'd ever slept on before in my life, surrounded by white curtains. I was wearing a light gown, made of white fabric and my arms and legs were bandaged heavily. I felt panic rise up in my chest and desperately tried to breathe it down. Panicking wouldn't help. I had to find out what was going on, where I was and whether or not I was in danger. The fact that they had taken the time to address my wounds could mean that they weren't goingt o harm me. Or it could mean that they simply wanted to harm me in a different way. I had been fooled by perceived kindness before...

There was a movement to my left and I flinched, immediately trying to go into a defensive stance. Due to my injuries and my heavy bandages, I ended up simply jerking like a fish on a hook, eyes wide and hostile as I stared at the man who had appeared behind the drawn curtain. He was... odd looking, to say the least. He was tall, thin and very old, with long silver hair and a matching long silver beard. He was wearing long colourful robes. His blue eyes were light, bright and sparkling behind half-moon spectacles and his nose was very long and crooked, as though it had been broken at least twice.

As he approached the bed he waved a wooden stick and a large, comfortable looking chair appeared. A wand. The stick was a wand. He took a seat, which put him on eye level with me, and folded his hands in his lap.

"Who are you?"

I winced when I heard how small and fragile my voice sounded.

"Ah, how rude of me. My name is Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, and I am the Headmaster of Hogwarts, School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."

I blinked at him, trying to wrap my mind around the information he had just given me. Hogwarts...Darryn had told me about Hogwarts. He'd been a student there...Before they took him.

The old man was still staring at me, his blue eyes strangely intense and suddenly I realized with a jolt what he was trying to do.

I had learned from a young age to make my mind my own, the only place where they couldn't get to me, couldn't hurt me. Not that they had stopped trying, of course, but it was the one part of me that they had never managed to reach.

I lowered my eyes and stared at my knees, anger bubbling inside of me. So I wasn't safe after all.

"Would you like to tell me your name?"

His voice was kind enough, his entire demeanor friendly, and if he had not just tried to steal my own thoughts from me I would have trusted him. But he had, and so I didn't. Not until I found out his reasons.

"I... don't know" I stuttered, my voice still embarrassingly weak. "My friend called me Aya."

I looked up and saw him raise an eyebrow.

"Would you like me to call you Aya then?"

I shook my head vehemently. No. That had been Darryn's name for me and it felt wrong, somehow, to have someone else use it.

"Is there another name you would like me to call you?"

His blue eyes were fixed on mine again, but this time he wasn't trying to get into my mind. I swallowed and shrugged, unable to do anything more.

"Perhaps later, then. Now child, would you be willing to tell me how you came to be unconscious on Hogwarts grounds in the middle of the rain?"

And so I told him.

Not all of it, of course, I wasn't a fool after all, but enough. I told him about how they'd taken me as a baby, about how they'd kept me for their amusement, about Darryn, and finally about how, after sixteen years, I had finally decided to fight back and escaped. He listened through all of it, never interrupting me, never seeming to doubt my word at all, and by the end of it, I was completely exhausted.

"Thank you for telling me. If you don't mind I would like to speak to you some more tomorrow, but for now, rest. You are safe here."

You are safe here.. Those words echoed in my head long after he had left, and when I fell asleep I realized that I believed them.


End file.
